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Letter: Remember Kaitlyn Through Happiness, Not Sadness

I’ve been following the story of Kaitlyn Krokowski and feel it’s time to address it. I’m a psychic medium and perhaps with my input, it will help the family and friends of Kaitlyn to understand the point of view from a metaphysical side.

The first article said that family and friends placed various items on and near the pole to pay their respect and to remember her. It also stated that “they can’t write to her, they can’t bring her something tangible” if a bench is placed somewhere. And, “They feel closer to her, connected, when they visit the pole. The pole satisfies something.”

Kaitlyn’s spirit would more likely be around places she loved, not where she left this plane. Feeling connected to a pole is not honoring her, it is only making those who visit it feel something and that something is sadness. Would Kaitlyn want her family/friends to be sad? Definitely not. She would want them to remember her where she laughed and enjoyed life. Bringing something tangible satisfies only those left behind.

Think of it this way: People don’t die where they’re buried, i.e. cemeteries, but people visit cemeteries to remember their loved ones who have crossed over to the other side. They feel comfort there, not at the scene of the accident.

Family/friends would be more connected to Kaitlyn’s spirit if they took the time to sit quietly and think of her. To hold something of hers in their hands and reflect on the life she lived while here on this earth for a short time. Talk to her, whether inwardly or outwardly. Let her know that you love her/miss her.

The bench would be a beautiful way to honor Kaitlyn. It would be a place of meditation, contemplation and remembrance. I don’t know the person who so generously wants to donate the bench, just to make that crystal clear, but I think it would be a better place for family/friends to “connect” with Kaitlyn, than the place where she lost her life. Think about this a moment. Be Kaitlyn for a moment. Would you want your loved ones to gather and think about you where you left this plane? It would only bring up the tragedy of this young woman’s short-lived life and keep everyone sad and depressed.

The pole does not bring joy, happiness or connections. It brings the reminder of the loss of life and that in turn will perpetuate negative feelings/sadness. Thinking negative and being sad will only reap you more of the same.

Embrace the offering of the bench. Embrace Kaitlyn’s spirit around you. Embrace life and each other. Plant a tree or flowers anywhere you feel comfortable and go to that spot to reach out to Kaitlyn. But to honor a pole with decorations, letters or your presence, is not honoring Kaitlyn, it’s just appeasing your loss. Smile and know that she’s around you, not waiting for you at that corner.

If anyone needs help with Kaitlyn’s crossing, free of charge; contact me at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .

K. Moon