What is a gadfly you ask?

I have read about them at stock market meetings of companies as a disruptive force. They draw attention to themselves and belabor a small point that has no meaning. The meeting is thrown into a turmoil and the ordinary business of the meeting is curtailed or lost. Some of these people do it as a profession and sometimes they are hired by people whose interests are to subvert the meeting and place attention on the wrong things.

Last week on a Thursday I ran into a real live, breathing, annoying, self-serving gadfly. I was asked to meet with a group of senior citizens to read and discuss some of my columns. I have been writing "Over 60 and Getting Younger" for over 10 years. At the rate of one column a week (never missed a deadline) that is over 500 columns. How I did it is another question entirely.

Anyway, I had spoken to this group before and we had a truly wonderful rapport. We came from the same time and place and the writings were both nostalgic and touching to some of the listeners. That is why they gave me a return engagement.

The group of about 14 was in a comfortable semi-circle and I began to read some of my columns. A gentleman raised his hand and asked me pointedly, "I thought this was a retirement group. How will you reading those columns help me with my retirement?" The room grew silent. It was obvious that this gentleman wanted to stun everyone (including me) and draw attention to himself. Damn everyone else!

A person in the audience said, "Each person's ways of filling out a day in retirement are different. We look for pleasant things, intellectual things to complete our days." He persisted, "This is not talk about retirement."

I realized that if he stayed in the room all speech and ideas would have to meet his stamp of approval. As people tried to placate him he became even more surly in his statements.

I arose from my speaker's chair and opened the door and left it open. It was an unspoken hint that if he was not happy, he could leave. Fortunately he took the hint and made a move to depart the scene. All the nice people urged him to stay but he had gotten the gist of my action and left.

We had a wonderful session after he was gone. If he sat there, we would all be playing to him. We talked easily and everyone was delighted.

Passing the time pleasantly is a cardinal rule of retirement.

Gadfly: (Definition - The Random House Dictionary of the English Language): 1. Any fly that bites or annoys domestic animals. 2. A person who repeatedly and persistently annoys others with schemes, ideas, demands, requests, etc.

This gentleman fit both definitions.

He was a true gadfly.